Cabbage & Pappardelle with Toasted Pine Nuts

A most distinguishable blue and white website that allows you to fully lose yourself into a contented mind numb, displays which can be an offensive stream of photos, and sometimes causes an occasional LOL has really got me feeling inadequate as a mother. Pissed me right the bleep off. There, I feel better admitting that. But for real - when I see Homemade Green Glow in the Dark Gummy Worms for Halloween, from scratch, I want to scratch. Her eyes out, that is. What is wrong with gummy worms from a bag once a year? Please, do you have to raise the bar that high? You're killing me! And really, how the H do you get homemade gummy worms to glow!? You've gone too far. Too. Far. What does this have to do with cabbage? Nothing! But read on for the recipe. It's a fabulous one! 

OK, I'm over my bad mom complex because now I'm thinking about this AWESOMELY delicious pasta! You MUST make this now! This dish is an easy weeknight meal in my house - do my kids eat it? Hell, no! But, one day they just might - anyway, more for me. Pine nuts are toasted until fragrant and crunchy then removed from the skillet. In that same skillet you caramelize half a head of sliced cabbage. MMMM. Detox. Cook up some egg-y pappardelle, reserving some cooking water for the sauce, which you toss the pasta with once the cabbage is all brown, caramelized and heavenly. Add back in the pine nuts and a gigantic grating of Parmigiano and you are sooo good. So. So. So Good. Way gooder than Glow in the Dark Anything. 

Tell me... How do you have a ball on Halloween? 

Printable Recipe Here

Update (7/26/15): Make this faster by roasting cabbage steaks on night one. On night two use the leftover cabbage steak ribbons for this dish by tossing leftover cabbage steak ribbons in a little olive oil over medium heat in a big skillet. Boil the pappardelle, pour into skillet when al dente, add in a little pasta water, pine nuts, parmesan, S&P. Toss.  

Cabbage & Pappardelle with Toasted Pine Nuts
recipe adapted from epicurious.com

4 tablespoons olive oil, divided
1/4 cup pine nuts (pistachios would be fab, too)
1/2 head of cabbage, sliced thinly
1 pound pappardelle
1/2 cup Parmigiano Reggiano, freshly grated + more for serving
Sea salt & freshly ground black pepper

Heat 2 tablespoons olive oil over moderate heat in a large (non-stick would be great here) skillet, add the pine nuts and toast, stirring frequently until brown and fragrant, about 3-4 minutes. Remove pine nuts from skillet. Reserve. 

Working in the same skillet, heat remaining 2 tablespoons olive oil over medium-high heat. Add sliced cabbage into skillet, season with salt and pepper, toss well to combine and DON'T STIR for at least 3-4 minutes. You want the cabbage to get brown and caramelized on the bottom, and if you STIR it won't happen! K? Love you. So... listen for angry hisses coming from the bottom and when the hissing is getting really angry, you can stir. Do this until all the cabbage is softened, browned, and about cooked down in volume by half, about 10-12 minutes. 

Meanwhile, boil the pappardelle according to package directions, but shave off a couple minutes of recommended cook  time, cooking noodles to al dente. When pasta is finished cooking, drain and reserve a giant coffee mug of the pasta water. 

Pour the cooked pasta into the skillet with the caramelized cabbage, shave Parmigiano over the top, splash with enough cooking water to make a luscious sauce and toss some more. Scatter with pine nuts. Season with additional salt and pepper. Serve with alotta more Parmigiano. Yum.